Jun 1, 2010 9:56am
Re: I can't believe I'm recommending this
Lord Buckley's Routines
God's Own Drunk
I'd like to do a little creative wig bubble for you called "God's Own Drunk."
I want the boys to... of course... with their Prince Bernard, and Sir James, and the Lady Doris and Prince Valentine.
You know, a creative orchestra, my lords, my ladies, is a rare and delightful thing. Right? Look! Do you see any music?
I gotta do a thing for you called, "The Cop Out," one time. It's a beautiful thing. And a thing called "The Bad-Rapping of the Marquis de Sade." A very interesting affair.
But for the moment I'd like to do for you "God's Own Drunk."
Said, eh, just like I say before. I, I'm a non-drinkin' man. Never drank for some season or other. Didn't like it. But like I said, too, I promised to take care of my brother-in-law's still while he went in to vote.
Went up there and it was just where the map said it was. And I'm a gonna tell you something - it was no little old five or ten cent still. It was laid there just like a golden mountain opel, with a kind of a honey dew cry comin' from it.
I ain't a drinkin' man, like I 'splained to you, but that big old yellow moon was a hangin' up there, and God's lanterns was a hangin' in the sky, and that curiosity got the best of me, and I took a slash.
And I got a crazy, revolutionary feelin' in my doby. That yellow whiskey went down my throat like honey dew vine water. Humph, it tasted mighty good!
I felt a revolution goin' through my body like there was great neon signs a goin' up an' sayin', "There's a Great Life a Comin'!"
Feelin' it talkin' to me, and I took another slash, and I got another jolt, and I took another slash, and I started to sing.
I started to sing.
And that big old yellow moon a hangin' out there and God's sweet lanterns a hangin' in the sky, and I's a singin'.
Never could sing a note before in my life, but I's a singin' as fine and as pretty as you'd ever want to hear.
And I took another slash.
And then I took a big full...
That big old yellow moon a hangin' out there. God's lanterns a hangin' in the sky, and suddenly I got a tremendous revolution of emotion in my bodylike I was fallin' in love with everything in God's sweet world that moved, lived, didn't live, animate, inanimate, black, blue, green, pink, mountains, fountains.
I was in love with life, 'cause I was drunk!!
I wasn't fallin' down, slippin', slidin' drunk.
I was GOD'S OWN DRUNK!
A fearless man!
And that's when I first saw the bear.
Big old Kodiak-lookin' fella, about sixteen foot tall.
I walked right on up to that bear, 'cause I was God's Own Drunk and I loved everything in this world. Walked right up tight to him about four-and-a-half feet and I looked right up in his eyes and I want to tell you somethin' brothers and sisters-my eyes was redder than his was! Hung him up.
And he's a sniffin', he's a sniffin'. He's tryin' to smell some fear. He can't do it, 'cause I'm God's Own Drunk and I'm a fearless man.
He expects me to do two things, flip or fly. I don't do either. Hangs him up.
I told him, I said, "Mr. Bear, I'm God's Own Drunk and I love every hair on your twenty-seven acre body. I'm a fearless man!"
Said, "I want you to go... I know you got bear friends over the hill there. Harry Bear, and Tim Bear, and Jelly Bear, and Tony Bear, and Teddy Bear, and Field Bear, Hazel Bear, John Bear, Pete Bear, and Rare Bear! Go over and tell all of them that I'm God's Own Drunk tonight and I love everything in God's green creation. I love them like brothers but if they give me any trouble I'm gonna run every God-damn one of 'em off the hill!"
I moved up. Don't you know he moved back two feet.
I reached up and took the bear by the hand. I said, "Mr. Bear, we're both beasts when it comes right down to it."
He's a lookin' down at me.
I said, "I want you to come with me. You're gonna be my buddy. Buddy Bear."
Took him right by his big, old, shaggy man-island sized hand, led him on over, sat him down by the still.
Well, he's a sniffin'. He's a sniffin'. He knows there's honey dew around there, some kind of honey bear honey dew of some kind. He's a sniffin'
I know what he's a sniffin' at.
I took a slash or two myself to taste 'er out and I filled him a bottle.
Did you ever see them bears, the sillouette of them bears at the circus, suckin' up that sasparilla? Ahhh, it's a fine lookin' sight!
And he downed another bottle. And he downed another bottle. And I put two more in him and pretty soon he started to sniff and snort. Tapped his foot.
And he got up and started to do The Bear Dance. Two sniffs, three snorts, a half a turn and one grunt.
And I'm trying' to do it, but I couldn't do it 'cause it was just like a jitterbug dance, it was so simple it evaded me.
But we was a dancin' and yellin'!
And God's sweet moon a hangin' in the sky, and God's sweet lanterns out there and there's jubilation and love on that hill.
And finally my love, it up and got so strong it overwhelmed my soul, and I laid back in the sweet green hill with that big, old Buddy Bear's paw right in mine and I went to sleep.
And I slept for four hours and dreamt me some tremulous dreams.
And when I woke up that old, yellow, moon was a hangin' in the sky, and God's sweet lanterns is out there and my buddy the bear was a missin'.
And you know something else, brothers and sisters?
So was the still!
From Buckley's Best, World Pacific Records
Transcribed by Earl Rivers
This post was modified by wineland on 2010-06-01 16:56:21